Another funny story..

Sam is a student at the Bronson Alcott - the school that is driving him crazy. In the school lunchroom he strikes back at the boring rules and regulations.

THIS SCHOOL IS DRIVING ME CRAZY!

'Can't you imagine it better?' Sam asked. 'Can't you imagine a school you'd want to go to?'

'Like, for instance?'

'Like a school,' Sam said, 'where you'd never have to do anything you didn't want to. If you didn't fell like reading, you could play ball.'

'Boring,' Benjy said.

'What do you mean, boring?'

Benjy pretended to throw up as he looked at the gooey macaroni and cheese that was the day's lunch. 'After a while,' he said, 'you'd get bored doing anything you wanted to. It'd be like summer all year long. I mean, summer's OK up to about the first week in August, but then, you know what, I start wanting somebody to tell me what to do even if I don't want to do it.'

'The trouble with you,' Sam said, 'is you haven't got much imagination.'

'What the hell does that mean?'

'It means,' Sam said, 'there's always something to do. There's never any reason to be bored. Watch.

'MY BRACE! MY BRACE!' Sam howled. 'I'VE LOST IT!'

'There's nothing wrong with your teeth,' Benjy whispered. 'You don't have a brace.' If Sam wasn't a friend of mine, Benjy was thinking, I'd figure him to be the biggest jerk in creation. And you know what? He is the biggest jerk in creation.

'REWARD! REWARD!' Sam was yelling. "I LOST MY BRACE, I LOST MY DEN-TAL APPLIANCE. IT'S IN THE MACARONI OR SOMEWHERE IN THE ICE CREAM. REWARD! REWARD!

The food line stopped. Some of the kids already at their tables looked at their trays, grimaced, and pushed them away.

Mr McEvoy, the head of the middle school, a tall, thin, balding man who prided himself on his ability to remain calm, or at least appear calm, whatever the provocation, walked briskly over to Sam. 'You really did not have to tell the whole world,' he said. 'Now, are you sure you lost your brace?'

Sam, trying not to grin, nodded affirmatively. Benjy, who had moved several steps away, was looking fixedly at the ceiling.

'Wait a minute,' Mr McEvoy said. 'You don't have a brace! I remember your mother saying that at least your teeth are prefect.' He began to make noises in his throat.

Jees, Sam thought, Mr McEvoy sounds like he's growling. He sounds like - like a dog.

'Sam!' Mr McEvoy's voice was loud, but it sounded strangled. 'This is a joke, isn't it?'

Benjy moved farther away from Sam, who kept his head down.

'Well,' said Sam, 'it just came to me, you see, Mr McEvoy.'

The head of the middle school, the growls coming faster and deeper, shut his eyes for a few seconds and then, enunciating each syllable with great care, said, 'You already have an appointment for detention with me this afternoon, Sam. It will be a long appointment. And you will have a very long composition to write on why students must not act like baboons in the school cafeteria.'

'ALL RIGHT!' Mr McEvoy tried to make his voice carry throughout the cafeteria. 'ALL RIGHT! NO BRACE, NO DENTAL APPLIANCE FELL INTO ANY OF THE FOOD. ONE SMALL BOY THOUGHT HE WAS BEING FUNNY. HE WAS NOT BEING FUN-NY. AND HE IS GOING TO BE VERY SAD. CONTINUE YOUR LUNCH!'

The kids at the tables looked suspiciously at their food trays, and some began to poke around in the macaroni. The food line started moving again, but most of the kids, judging by how little macaroni they took, didn't seem to be very hungry.

'Terrific,' Benjy said to Sam. 'Terrific. if that's what you call imagination, I'd rather have a toothache.'

'What was that all about?' asked Blake Edwards, who had been waiting in the food line. 'You crazy?' he said to Sam.

'Some days nobody's got a sense of humour,' Sam said, annoyed at Benjy and annoyed at himself.

'Now, look here.' Blake poked Sam in the chest. 'Food is nothing to fool around with. Even what they call food here. You can mess with me a whole lot of other ways, but do not mess with my food. First of all, by eleven o'clock, I am thinking about nothing but food. And second, eating time is the only time you get for yourself in this school the whole damn day. You picked the wrong place, man, to have your joke, if that's what it was.'

'Oh, go to hell - both of you!' Sam said. He stalked off.